Boy, I've been busy!

For everyone in my vast blogging audience, I must extend my profound apologies for not having written in a couple of days. You see, I have been extremely busy. After searching for the perfect job since November, I believe that I have finally found a position that suits my talents perfectly.

Yes, I'm a balloon. Who would have thought that that would be an option? It's awfully tiring, having to flail my arms like this hour after hour, but the pay is incredible. I had no idea I could make an upper-middle-class living as a balloon waving to people! It's truly astonishing, and pretty enlightening. This must be what they mean by the "hidden job market." The job market that no one tells you about. I mean, here I was, sending out resume after resume for hours on end, when the ideal position was practically waving right at me as I drove down the local access road.

There was a large "We're Hiring!" sign by the local Honda dealership. I pulled up and without even getting out of my car, I rolled down the window and yelled over at a manager.

"Hey! What positions are you hiring for?"
"It's kinda like a job in advertising."
"Advertising? Why, I have an advertising background!"
"You do? Hey, that's great. That's just great. Well, park your car over there my friend and let's talk about it."

Needless to say, I got the job! The hours are pretty long, but I don't mind. I actually enjoy this line of work. It reminds me of my old days back in the 1980s with Richard Simmons, a personal friend of mine. If you look closely at one of his old VHS tapes, like "Flailin' to the Folk Songs," that's me in the background with the harmonica holder, shaking my arms and legs with a charming spasticity.

The only problem with this new balloon job is, twice now I've been carried up about 100 feet into the air by strong winds. Once, I actually flew over Central Expressway, and landed in a completely different car dealership's parking lot. I almost got fired for freelancing with another company. My manager seems to understand that it wasn't exactly my fault, and he promises to look into the possibility of having an ergonomic review done of my work space to help me to perform my duties better in the future.

Well, if you're in McKinney anytime soon, come by and wave at me. I'll be sure to wave back. In fact, I might even wiggle at you.

I'm such a rogue.